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We all love a little fun with words, and this isn’t the first use of Covidiots, and I felt like a little time off from my Turing Machine interpreter, so I thought I’d examine the article. My main thrust here is at irresponsible reporting, and I should warn you that last time I looked, The Toronto Sun had bodacious babes on page 3.

You can locate the original article with a quick search, but look too for the retraction the following day which (retraction) to me signals the publisher’s/editor’s realization that this first issue pictured above was wrong, wrong, wrong.

But by then the damage was done. First Impressions Count, remember?

>>  Amid a pandemic causing so much death and destruction,

It will not have escaped your notice that if you remove the first three letters of “democracy” from the word “pandemic” you get a new word entirely, but related in one way to The Common Mob, who are Not To Be Trusted.

But my eye was caught by the word “destruction”. You have your own hardcover 1,000-page dictionary, I know, but mine includes the word “annihilate” in its definition and does not include a reference to material objects. That is, “destruction” first brings to my mind a building being knocked or torn down, but the word “destruction” can apply just as well to an institution or a practice.

None the less, my sense of “destruction” includes the wiping-out or erasure, and the only grand thing I can see that has been wiped out is the economy, and that is caused not by the pandemic (except in the sense of the shortened word), but by various government officials. I have nightmare visions of some preppy youngster suggesting “self-isolation” to a prime minister, premier, or president, and the idea being seized (“A new term in my lexicon could mean A New Term in Office; Let’s go for it!”) and the idea being seized on by young preppies in other countries.

Way to go!

Panic!

Our economy has not been destroyed by the Covid19 virus, but by unthinking reactions by officials to a problem that could have been solved back in March.

I acknowledge that far too many families have been confronted by grief ahead of time. We are all going to die, but some of us have had that date brought forward, and our families were confronted with grief and deprived of a further ten, twenty, or forty years of enjoyment.

Too, I acknowledge the personal financial distress of individuals who were struggling to keep their heads above water and finally drowned in a sea of debt because their basic wage, part-time, or full-time job disappeared overnight, as they found when they loyally fronted up for work one morning. I’ve been broke several times in my life, and it is not funny; it is a thing of terror. Or at least, it was for me.

>>  a bunch of cov-idiots

I used to think that an idiot was someone without an iota of id, but nowadays I see that an idiot is associated with “a person incapable of rational conduct”. In the rest of the article I see no rational justification for this.

We are given no evidence that the people at these gatherings had not discussed the parties rationally and carefully (more below). On the contrary: it seems to me that the county official and/or the journalist is the one who has given no thought to their actions. That is to say, it is the county official and/or the journalist who has been shown to be incapable of rational conduct, and while we might not expect it of Walla Walla, we ought to expect rational conduct from elected officials (I know, I know)

>>  are gleefully arranging gatherings

“joyfully”, since you ask. And why not? I learned yesterday that Riffs Department Store had re-opened, albeit with a limit of three people in the barn at any one time. (I think that they mean “three customers”, but let that go). I almost went down there to buy something I don’t need. I would have gone, just to be in contact with Real Human Beings, but I don’t have a car, so I would have been forced to stand in the bitingly cold northerly wind, occupying a parking spot, until my number was called. Instead I plucked the next John Grisham from my shelves, made a pot of tea, pulled up the rug, and …

Gleeful seems to be the right word for almost anyone who is under the government imposed voluntary imprisonment. (look it up!)

>>  with the stated intent to contract the virus,

Now we are getting to the meet of the matter. The impact of the flesh, you might say.

Who are these “idiots”? Might they be sane, rational people? Might they be (shock! Horror!! Outrage!!!) doctors who have decided to expose their bodies to Covid in order to run a controlled experiment to gather precious data on infection? OK, probably not. But might they be healthy people who have discussed the issues with their GPs (by phone, of course) before discussing collectively (by Zoom, of course) about the pros and cons?

I have held the concept of Herd Immunity to be true since long before Covid, see for example “ German Measles ”; I have maintained that the first news of Covid came to us midNovember 2019, at which time I estimate some five cars a day were making the trip to and from St John’s (two regular scheduled taxi runs to the International Airport, the rest: local people picking up a new kitchen range, medical and dental appointments, or whatever). People in Bonavista meet and greet, shake hands, help each other out, carry two coffees in paper cups, one for you, one for me, and put foodstuffs back on the shelves after reading the printed labels.

Bonavista’s business is founded on the four-month tourist season; Be Nice To Strangers, please.

Between midNovember and midMarch one hundred and twenty days of bodily contact took place in Bonavista, including contact with folks who had flown in from Rome, London, Cairo, Tokyo and so on for family gatherings. Remember Christmas Day?

You don’t need stated intent to contact the virus; you just need to be a human being. And that’s the only qualification you need. You need take no especial action except to wake up not-dead each morning (as do I) and go about your life living with other human beings.

You can take “rising from my bed this morning” as a stated intent to deal with other human beings. Or you can hide under the covers.

>>  warn officials.

These are not the same officials who warned us to remain indoors and give the Covid19 virus time to mutate, but I lump them in with that crowd whose generic motto is “Better safe than sorry”, especially when it comes to being re-elected. At least MY job is safe!

>>  Dubbed “COVID-19 parties,”

And why not! I would have attended had I been invited. I have stated previously that I am now in my 888th (or thereabouts) virus of my lifetime and that I have been exposed to the Covid19 virus for the past 180 days (has it been that long!) ( January 14th 2021 "The new Covid variant, B117, is rapidly spreading around the UK" in the first two minutes mentions a mutation rate of perhaps two per month, which would boost my tally to 1776, a strange co-incidence)

I would have taken a plate of my home-made ginger-snap cookies and had fun, AND taken bets that I would not exhibit symptoms over the next 180 days. I rarely gamble, and even more rarely bet with cash, but this is one I would have ridden with both of my debit cards and both of my credit cards.

>>  the Washington state county of Walla Walla

I confess to jumping the gun. When first I saw the location “Walla Walla” I assumed it was the aboriginal name of a town near the border of New South Wales and Victoria; those Eastern-Staters are funny people. Think “Woolloomooloo” and “Widgiemooltha” and “Wangaratta” and “Walla Walla”.

What?

Yes, I was right. Australia does too have a Walla Walla, and it is near the border, about fifty kilometres NW of Lake Hume. For a moment there I though that the Covid19 thingy had rotted my brain, that I had been elected to public office without realizing it, …

>>  report the emergence of an imbecilic initiative

“You imbecile!” was what you said last time you were stumped for a response. “You imbecile!” is what we say when we are stalling for time. “You imbecile!” is most commonly an expression used by people who can’t think of a rational response.

“initiative” is “the ability to initiate things”, to originate things.

So let me see if I’ve got this right: We have here a group of people who are creative and an official who can’t think of a rational response?

Well, that is SO like me! I am always right, and when I meet someone who disagrees with me it is clear to me that they are “an adult with the mental age of about five”. (FWIW I was writing letters to my mother at age four, which might explain how the journalist weaseled in under the bar)

We are given no scrap of data to justify this; we have only the official’s reaction.

Perhaps this group of people had already contracted the virus, presented symptoms, isolated, recovered, and been re-tested and declared non-infectious, and were ready to test the theory? Rightly or wrongly that doesn’t seem imbecilic to me. Fool-hardy, perhaps. But given that, by definition, the people are at the apex of human resistance to viruses (”Not one of our ancestors died in infancy” - Richard Dawkins writing in “River out of Eden” ) they weren’t playing the odds at the level of Russian Roulette.

>>  where healthy people mingle with infected individuals

This is what viruses are all about, and remember that they (the viruses) have been at it for three billion years. Us humans for only five million. The viruses are in it for the long slog. For five million years humans have mingled with other humans who harbour the virus-of-the-month, and the virus is a time-bomb that replicates and is transmitted to another human before the symptoms appear.

Viruses that killed humans on contact did not survive three billion years, because on contact the human was felled like a tree and did not contaminate other humans. End of virus.

There is no other world except this one we live in, and we share the planet with viruses. And viruses infect healthy people.

So how are we humans to survive? Well, here the definition of “healthy” kicks into play. A healthy person has a robust immune system. The virus makes contact, jumps into cells, and the human immune system casts an eye and says “Hang on a minute! I recognise those brass buttons, that peaked cap, those spent .303 shell casings”, and blows the whistle. That is what it means to be healthy: the proven ability to ward off disease.

>>  hoping to contract the virus

Forget about “hoping”. It has been six months now, one hundred and eighty days. Covid19 is in every place that is within a day’s drive of an airstrip. And so Covid19 is in every place that is within a day’s drive by car. Viruses are very good (see “three billion years” above) at spreading by human contact (yes, and our avian friends, and pigs and …)

You don’t “hope to catch the virus”. The virus is programmed to leap at you; and your body is programmed to repel the virus. It is an arms race (Richard Dawkins again).

I do agree with “contract”; the word suggests a written-down agreement between parties. “If you will let me live in the house, I will agree to pay you the $70 mortgage fees every week” is how it goes.

Unless, of course, the journalist is an adult with the mental age of about five and a limited command of language and was thinking “contact”, but “contract” was longer and more grown-up. I know that I wrote like that when I was five.

>>  and then hoping to bounce back from the killer disease.

All diseases are potential killers, but not all diseases are killers.

If you are uneasy in your mind, you are distracted, and may well collide your vehicle with another vehicle. The odds increase if the other driver is distracted, that is, uneasy in their mind, or dis-eased.

Covid19 is a potential killer. My understanding is that a section of the population can be defined as high-risk – the very young, the very old, and those people already battling ill-health. If last week you received a double lung transplant, you are still in an ICU with only immediate family members allowed to visit you.

The rest of us are not at high-risk, and Covid19 is most unlikely to kill us. Divide the total number of deaths (attributed to Covid19 over the past six months) by the world’s population (about nine Billion) and those are your first-estimate odds against dying from Covid19.

Now the same calculation, but this time use the total number of deaths excluding “deaths of young, old, already sick”. If you hadn’t bet money on the first odds, I hope that the new odds will convince you to put your life-savings on surviving Covid19.

>>  “Walla Walla County health officials are receiving reports of COVID-19 parties occurring in our community, where non-infected people mingle with an infected person in an effort to catch the virus,” the county said in a press release.

Receiving reports? Please see “contact tracing” below.

It is no longer “a party” but “parties”. Now you see how infectious panic can be. At first you thought “So what if a couple of dozen people in a town that has trouble deciding whether it is in Washington, Oregon, or Idaho keel over?”, but panic, and Gloom, Alarum and Despondency is so infectious that even before you have reached the end of the article the idea of infection has spread and infected the minds of the Walla Walla County health officials. And if it can do that to health officials, fer heaven’s sakes, we must all be at risk.

Quick! Tell everybody!

>>  This senseless and completely moronic practice

Sigh. You already know what I’m thinking.

But there is some improvement here. “Moron” is “an adult with a mental age of about 8-12”, but I’m not sure if this mental age applies to the party-goers or the county officials. If the party-goers then I am all for infection by Covid19. I mean, if you can go to a party with friends, knock back a few cold ones, and boost your mental age by three to seven years, why not? Sign me up! I have long thought that I could be brighter than I am; just never knew how to go about it, is all. Plus, if I know anything at all about Washington Sate, the host will let us watch football on an 108” flat-screen TV.

>>  was discovered when officials started contact tracing.

Aha! Those of you in Australia who have downloaded the federal government’s latest ap might want to pause here and reflect. You may even want to buy a new phone, a new number, a new SIM card, and leave your old phone on the tracks waiting for the 8:15 Albury-Wodonga express to do its job. Stand well back; like express mainline trains, black glass fragments travel long distances at high speed.

Now that officials (federal or the Walla-Walla wallahs?) are tracking you, you better be careful where you step.

Because we know where you’ve been.

This to me is more frightening than Covid19 (gaaaah! I’ve been infected with Panic20)

>>  According to Meghan DeBolt, director of the county Department of Community Health,

I have never met Meghan DeBolt, but would love to do so. If I can quickly crowd-source the funds to travel from Bonavista to St John’s in an infected taxi, fly to Toronto International Airport and mingle with passengers arriving by TTC buses and subways, and GO buses and trains, sit in a three-by-four-by-three seater to Seattle (more public transit) then a commuter flight to Walla Walla, I should be the toast of the town and find myself invited to three, maybe four, parties per day. All this and meet Meghan.

In the meantime I’d settle for a list of Meghan’s qualifications. At least a list of Richard Dawkin’s books she has read. Meghan might email me, in the first instance, …

>>  at least 25 people were infected after they attended these functions.

Now, how do we know this?

(1) Where did that number 25 come from? I suddenly realize that I do not know (was not told) how many people were at the original party.

(2) Were 25 people stringently tested before attending? Remember, if there is ONE virus in your left arm and they take a sample of blood from your right arm, you will come up showing that you don’t have the virus, but within ten virus generations you will have 1,024 copies of the virus swimming around. If they sample saliva from inside your right cheek, read “left cheek”, or read “right” and “left” lungs, and if both, how many lobes are there in a single lung?

(3) Were 25 people stringently tested after attending?

(4) So Infection. Did their immune systems successfully recognise the brass buttons and shell casings, and did the immune systems rout the enemy instanter? It makes a difference.

(5) Were the 25 people just like me: live alone, can go home and eat stored food supplies, read John Grisham novels for two weeks without leaving the house, except to bring in another pail of rain water from outside my back door.

(6) I note that we really have moved forward from a party to “these functions”. What is the population of Walla Walla? What proportion of the population of Walla-Walla is so fed up with official house-arrest that, discovering that officials have been hiding the truth, decided “the hell with it; I’m going to have a grog with my buddy Greg”. Perhaps the party idea is infectious and has swept the town. In that case Walla-Walla will be free of carriers, and we should be grateful to Meghan DeBolt for actively promoting resistance to the Covid19 virus. For my money she should be President.

We could do worse.

(7) Please forward this attachment to as many people as possible. Use CC rather than BCC to make sure that computer viruses will help spread the message: Send $100 (email transfer only, please) to the “Meghan_DeBolt_for_President_Election_Campaign” whose email address is CPRGreaves@GMail.com .

Once the Town Hall of Bonavista re-opens I shall formalize matters.

You can trust me.

I’m not an elected official.

Cheers

Chris

709-218-7927 The Landfall Garden House 60 Canon Bayley Road Bonavista, Newfoundland CANADA A0C 1B0 CPRGreaves@gmail.com Home